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UTAH STATE PRISON — Brookes Colby Shumway says he is tired of deceiving people.
"I'm just tired of causing pain toward everyone," he said during a parole hearing Tuesday at the Utah State Prison. "I know every time I lie and try to deceive people, I know that is causes more pain and suffering to Christopher (Ray)'s family."
By the end of the hearing, after some prodding by Utah Board of Pardons and Parole Chairwoman Angela Micklos, Shumway said he stabbed his childhood friend to death after his friend had made advances on him. He also admitted that the two had "made out" at least four times prior and that he was confused about his feelings for his friend.
On Jan. 23, 2000, Shumway was 15 when he stabbed his friend, 14-year-old Christopher Ray, 39 times with a kitchen knife during a sleepover at Christopher's house in Cottonwood Heights. Although he was 15 at the time, Shumway was ordered to stand trial as an adult and at age 16 was convicted of murder.
His conviction was overturned, however, by the Utah Supreme Court, which determined that jury instructions were not given correctly. Not wanting to go through the pain of another trial, Christopher's parents agreed to a plea deal. Shumway pleaded guilty to manslaughter and aggravated burglary. He was sentenced to five years to life for the burglary, and one to 15 years for manslaughter. The sentences were ordered to be served consecutively.
In 2007, Shumway's first attempt at parole was denied. On Tuesday, Shumway, now 31, again went before a member of the parole board.
In a recording of the hearing, Micklos noted that at least one of Shumway's psychological evaluations in preparation for the hearing diagnosed him with avoidant personality disorder, making it hard for Shumway to discuss his feelings. She then asked him to talk about his friendship with Christopher, whom he had known since the seventh grade.
"We just kind of grew a bond with each other, started hanging out, playing with each other," Shumway said, speaking in a polite, low monotone voice. "We seemed pretty close, quick to laugh with each other and have fun. It seemed like it was a really close friendship."
The two enjoyed playing video games. On the night of the fatal sleepover, the two had played video games for more than six hours before going to bed sometime between midnight and 1 a.m.
Shumway said that's when Christopher came on to him.
"He started making sexual advances toward me. He tried to kiss me. And from there, I got mad at him," he said. "He ended up going to sleep and I was still stewing over it.
"I think he felt it was resolved at that point. But for me, I don't think I could just let it go," he said.
Shumway, who had a history of being bullied in school, said he had a habit of bottling up his feelings and his anger and not tell anyone what was happening.
"I was ashamed to let people know I was being picked on and felt like I should have to handle it myself instead of others," he said. "I know I tried to bottle that anger up, and I could just feel all the anger that I had come loose that night, like I couldn't hold it in any more."
Micklos questioned Shumway about the different explanations he has given for the murder over the years, including originally claiming it was in self-defense.
"I was scared at the time, and I knew I was in trouble and I didn't want people to think I was a horrible monster … so I tried to cover it up. I thought maybe people wouldn't judge me," he said. "Most of the time it was fear (why I lied). A lot of time it was shame about how I acted."
Shumway said after taking many therapy classes in prison, he has learned that he continues to hurt people by lying.
"There's not a day that goes by that I wish I could go back and change (what I did). I know, for me, I wish people would forgive me, but I know they won't. I know it's one of the worst things a person can do. I just wish I could take it back," he said.
When Micklos asked what he would say to Christopher today, Shumway replied, "I'm sorry. I wish that I was a better friend, someone that could understand and could have been there for him."
But Debbie Getty, Christopher's mother, said she believes Shumway is still not being truthful.
"I just want to remind you that Brookes has never showed any remorse at all. He has never said he's sorry and truly meant it. He has never taken any accountability. He has always blamed Christopher from day one or the family from day one," she said.
"We have been asking for 16 years, why? Why did you invite yourself into my home? Why did you ask us to go to your house so you could pick up a bag? Why in that bag was a knife, duct tape, rope and a video on how to kill someone? He does not know the meaning of honesty. He has not repented.
"I honestly believe that if he gets out, and if somebody makes him angry again, it's just all going to be the same thing," Getty said.
When asked by Micklos about the video, Shumway denied having it.
"I don't even know where you'd find something like that," he said.
"I know no matter what I say that I won't ever gain that forgiveness. But I am truly and deeply sorry for the life I have taken in Christopher. And I hope one day they will see that I am sorry and remorseful for my crime," Shumway said.
At that point in the hearing, Micklos told Shumway she felt she still wasn't getting the whole story.
"There's just something that seems to be missing," she said.
Shumway then conceded that night wasn't the first time his friend had made advances.
"There was more than one incidence with coming on to me. There was some acting out on it earlier on," he said.
Shumway said despite making out, he was starting to have feelings about girls and was confused about the feelings he had for his friend.
"I feel like we're finally getting more to what was going on," Micklos said.
Micklos noted that Shumway has been a model inmate, getting his GED, taking college courses and not having one disciplinary write-up in 16 years. She also noted that two separate psychological evaluations determined Shumway would be a low risk for reoffending if released. Furthermore, under the sentencing guideline recommendations, Shumway would already be out of prison.
The full five-member board will now vote to determine whether to grant parole.
