From law enforcement to healing: Utah clinician shares personal journey with PTSD

BLUFFDALE — Men's mental health often goes unnoticed, especially for those struggling. One Utah man is breaking the silence about his battle with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and how healing led him to a new purpose: helping others. After years working in law enforcement and public safety — including time in a detention center, probation, and with a police department — Jeffrey Ainsa knew how to stay alert. "You're always scanning and anticipating," he said. "We were working with victims of violent crimes and their families, and responding on scene to those calls. I don't think people understand the toll that takes on you." What he didn't know was how to turn it off. At home, the stress never stopped. His wife and children learned to give him time to decompress before interacting with him. But one night, it all came crashing down — when he mistook his wife for an intruder. "I just saw someone move, and so I jumped out of the bed and grabbed her and threw her down," he recalled, emotional. "And so, it's a piece that I struggle still with." That terrifying moment pushed Ainsa to seek help. Therapy taught him just how deeply PTSD had shaped his behavior — and how to slowly reclaim peace. "PTSD still sticks with you. It comes and goes, and that's a thing that I've had to learn," he said. Today, Ainsa is a licensed mental health clinician with evolvedMD. He uses his experience to help others navigate trauma. "I'm really candid where I tell them, 'Guys, I'm telling you stuff to do that I struggle dealing with myself, and that I still struggle with,'" he said. Healing didn't come all at once — it came in small steps. He now uses grounding techniques like deep breathing, tapping his feet, and even recalling comforting scents. "When I smell cinnamon, I think about when I was little, and it would snow, and my mom would make homemade cinnamon rolls. You can smell it and focus on that memory — that is a grounding exercise that brings you back to, 'You're here, you're safe, you're good.'" Ainsa said PTSD isn't just something veterans or officers deal with. Trauma is human, and getting help shouldn't feel like weakness. "Talk to someone about it," he said. "You don't have to live in your head. There's hope."

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts or exhibiting warning signs, call, text, or chat the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988, which is answered 24/7/365 by crisis counselors at the Huntsman Mental Health Institute. All calls to legacy crisis hotlines, including the old National Suicide Prevention hotline, 1-800-273-8255, will also connect to a crisis care worker at the Huntsman Mental Health Institute.

Additional resources

• SafeUT: Parents, students, and educators can connect with a licensed crisis counselor through chat by downloading the SafeUT app or by calling 833-3SAFEUT (833-372-3388)
• SafeUT Frontline: First responders, including firefighters, law enforcement, EMS, and healthcare professionals, can chat with a licensed crisis counselor at no cost 24/7/365 by downloading the SafeUT Frontline app.
• SafeUTNG: Members of the National Guard can chat with a licensed crisis counselor at no cost 24/7/365 by downloading the SafeUTNG app.
• Utah Warm Line: For non-crisis situations, when you need a listening ear as you heal and recover from a personal struggle, call 1-833 SPEAKUT 8:00 a.m.-11:00 p.m., 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
• The Huntsman Mental Health Institute offers a wide variety of programs and services, including suicide prevention and crisis services, hospital treatment, therapy & medication management, substance Use & addiction recovery, child & teen programs, and maternal mental health services, including birth trauma, pregnancy loss, infertility, and perinatal mood and anxiety disorders.
• LiveOnUtah.org is a statewide effort to prevent suicide by promoting education, providing resources, and changing Utah’s culture around suicide and mental health. They offer resources for faith-based groups, LGBTQ+, youth, employers, firearm suicide prevention, and crisis and treatment options.

Counties in Utah provide services for mental health and substance use disorders. Centers are run by the thirteen Local Mental Health and Substance Use Authorities all across the state and offer therapy, substance use disorder treatment, support groups, mobile services, youth treatment, and more. These resources and more information can be found here: https://www.uacnet.org/behavioralhealth.

Other community-based resources

• NAMI Utah provides education, support, and advocacy for individuals and families impacted by mental illness.
• EvolvedMD integrates mental health care directly into primary care settings for easier access to support.
• The Department of Veterans Affairs provides specialized PTSD treatment and resources for veterans.
• American Foundation for Suicide Prevention offers prevention programs, public education, support for loss survivors, and fundraising for research.
• Encircle Utah: LGBTQ+ family and youth resource center.
• Utah Pride Center empowers Utah’s diverse LGBTQ+ community.
• The Trevor Project: LGBTQ teen resource center.
• U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs Mental Health
• Latino Behavioral Health Services
• Center for Workplace Mental Health offers suicide prevention and response for employers.

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