Estimated read time: 6-7 minutes
SALT LAKE CITY — A new baby often brings profound love, joy and excitement to a family, but amid the oxytocin and newborn snuggles can reside a darkness for which new mothers may not have prepared: postpartum depression.
The Utah Department of Health and Human Services reports that 1 in 3 Utah women will experience depression or anxiety during pregnancy, or depression after pregnancy. Maternal mental health includes additional mental health challenges such as anxiety, bi-polar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder and psychosis. Mothers can experience mental health issues anytime during pregnancy, at any point during the first year of the baby's life and even beyond.
As isolating and frightening as it can be for these women to face such extreme mood disorders — all while caring for at least one and often multiple children — hope and healing can be found through many different resources throughout Utah.
Aubrey Grossen, of St. George, started a community known as ANYA (A New You Again), which means "Mama" in Hungarian, after struggling with some serious postpartum depression symptoms of her own.
"Basically, I live to help women with their mental health," Grossen said.
ANYA includes a free Facebook community, retreats and a paid membership that includes phone calls with therapists, as well as Marco Polo "circles" connecting moms in similar situations to support each other.
"There's a lot of coaching and therapy involved … but people rave about the 'come as you are' community that we have within ANYA," Grossen said. "When people sign up for it, they end up staying, because they make some of their very best friends in there."
Ending the stigma
Kelsi Perry, from Riverton, kept quiet about her postpartum depression after her first baby, for fear that her child would get taken away from her. Years later, after dealing with challenging pregnancies, an umbilical hernia following the birth of her son, emergency gall bladder surgery after the birth of her daughter and the onslaught of coronavirus, amid other personal challenges, Perry said she was mentally diving, and her husband encouraged her to go to an ANYA retreat.
The day she was leaving for the retreat, she began to have her fourth miscarriage and would miscarry that baby's twin later that week. She decided to go to the retreat to glean support from other understanding women, and said it ended up being a blessing for her to be there during the miscarriage, because she didn't feel so alone.
Perry said attending that retreat was a catalyst for the community support she's gained, that has helped her survive the severe postpartum depression and anxiety following the birth of her youngest child, born in 2022. ANYA has taught her healthy coping tools, such as getting outside before 10 a.m. each morning, waking up before her kids to commune with God and reciting positive affirmations.
Perry's fellow ANYA community member, Camille Laycock, of Lehi, has two children with special needs. She was seeking more joy in motherhood rather than the anxiety she had been consumed with, and she has also learned life-altering skills from ANYA.
One of those skills is learning what self-care really means. Rather than eating a donut and washing it down with a Diet Coke, Laylock has learned taking a shower and getting dressed in the morning is a better option for effective self-care.
She also shared the acronym of "MOMMY" that she learned from ANYA, which stands for:
- Meet with God/Meditation
- Opportunities of growth
- Movement
- Moment of stillness
- Yourself (which can mean taking a nap or a break from social media each day)
"Anya helped me realize and really accept my own potential," Laycock said.
Finding a community
Another helpful resource for Utah women dealing with postpartum depression is The Sad Moms Club, a podcast started by psychiatric mental health nurse practitioner Joni Lybbert, of Highland.
Research shows community is a huge part of healing for these moms.
–Joni Lybbert
Lybbert said the purpose of her podcast is to let Utah women know they're not alone and to educate them about the resources in Utah, including therapists, specialists, doulas and physicians, so they can connect to those resources.
Though therapy in general can be great, it may not be helpful to work with a therapist who doesn't fully understand, Lybbert said. Whereas working with a therapist who specializes in maternal mental health can create a safe space for mothers to say what they may not dare say anywhere else such as, "I hate being a mom," or "I don't want to be around my baby." These specialized therapists can give moms permission to struggle, without judgment, and also guide them through to a happier place.
Lybbert pointed to maternalmentalhealth.utah.gov as a helpful resource for therapy or support groups. She said any professionals listed there must be trained through Postpartum Support International, which is another resource for mothers.
Postpartum Support International has a phone number women can call to be connected with a local therapist and they don't have to do the legwork to find help. The organization can also connect women with specialized, free support groups for moms who have had babies in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, adoptive parents, parents with postpartum depression and anxiety, etc.
"The research shows community is a huge part of healing for these moms," Lybbert said.
About 6½ years ago, Lyndsey Proctor started Serenity Recovery and Wellness, a maternal mental health center specializing in the care of women during the reproductive years.
Proctor wanted women to have the opportunity to go to therapy for more than one hour a week, and she also wanted to prevent them from having to be hospitalized and therefore separated from their children due to postpartum depression. Serenity patients can spend nine to 12 hours a week at the facility, and they are able to bring their children with them so they don't have to find child care of their own. There, they also have the opportunity to be around other moms facing similar challenges.
"We know that support groups are really helpful with maternal mental health and just being around other moms that creates that common humanity of 'I'm not alone and the only person struggling with this,'" Proctor said. "And there's just something really healing and powerful that we observe (in) the moms when they're in a group setting with each other."
There is hope
Kearns resident Mariana Kartchner started doing exposure therapy at Serenity in March earlier this year, shortly after her daughter was born. She said the therapy was extremely helpful and she learned how to accept her anxiety as a part of her life instead of pushing it away in an attempt to try to feel safe.
She compared her anxiety to being like a friend that comes over, but she's too busy to spend time with that friend, so it just sits with her while she gets other things done.
"I've been the happiest, truly, that I've ever been in my life and (had) the least amount of anxiety now, thankfully, to Serenity."
Taeler Houlberg, of West Valley City, has been treated for postpartum obsessive-compulsive disorder at Serenity.
She said she has learned it is not uncommon for women dealing with postpartum obsessive-compulsive disorder to be misdiagnosed with psychosis.
"Just being diagnosed with (obsessive-compulsive disorder), generally speaking, was huge and then to work through my postpartum (obsessive-compulsive disorder) saved my life, I would say," Houlberg said.
Serenity has offices in Riverton and Provo, and accepts the majority of insurances in addition to self-pay.
