FLIGHTSVILLE — I've heard the flight attendant safety speech so many times that I either recite the spiel with them or tune it out completely, but this attendant would have definitely kept my attention.
The Southwest Airlines flight attendant decided to make the Federal Aviation Administration required safety instructions a little more exciting for the passengers by throwing in jokes left and right.
If any of the people on board weren't paying attention when she called her colleagues an ex-husband, new boyfriend and their divorce attorney, they certainly tuned in when she talked about the flotation devices.
"In the highly unlikely event that the captain lands us near a hot tub, everybody gets their very own teeny, weeny, yellow Southwest bikini — one size fits all," the flight attendant said while her associate demonstrated the device with a little dance.
By that time, she had the entire plane laughing, and I wished that she had been on one of the many flights with boring instructions I've been on.
Instead of sounding like a bored robot, like many other flight attendant speeches you hear, she made it something that the passengers wouldn't soon forget.
Plus, she simplified it: "Basically, just do what we say and nobody gets hurt," which is what flight instructions boil down to anyway.
My favorite line? "If you're traveling with small children, we're sorry."
Amanda is an intern at KSL. She attends Utah Valley University where she is studying journalism with a minor in digital media and will graduate in 2015. She is the assistant life editor for the UVU Review. Follow her on Twitter at @HollmanAmanda.