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LAYTON — Terry McDade walked around Layton's Vietnam Memorial Wall replica, looking at all the names of the fallen, his reflection barely visible in the black marble.
After he was selected to receive the Honor Roll for Veterans Award from SourceAmerica, McDade, 74, of Layton, admitted that while he was honored, the prestige of the conference and the award itself felt odd to him.
"Here I am, a blue-collar, working class, and all of a sudden, I got this very prestigious national award going, 'What did I do?' Because, you know, you look at all a lot of these other veterans that are running businesses, and they've done this and they've done that, and everything else," McDade said. "I had a tough time figuring out why I was selected for this."
SourceAmerica honored McDade for both his service in the Marine Corps and his service to those around him at a conference in Anaheim on May 24, celebrating McDade and other National Achievement Award winners.
Many of these winners also included nonprofits, businesses and employees who showed exceptional service by giving hope and advancing inclusivity in the workplace — especially for those with disabilities, according to a SourceAmerica press release.
As an enterprise that provides resources and employment for those with disabilities, SourceAmerica especially honored McDade for his help to bring awareness to post-traumatic stress disorder in veterans.
Promoting PTSD awareness
Since McDade returned home from his service in the Marine Corps, he has worked tirelessly to promote mental health and PTSD awareness — he explains that entering a post-traumatic stress disorder program for himself was one of the best decisions he ever made.
When McDade began his service in the Vietnam War as a mechanic, he volunteered to be a door gunner, and later became a crew chief — but the missions presented unexpected and unpleasant experiences.
"I learned some of the things that you see flying on missions is not what you think it's going to be," McDade said. "You see people die. You see people die younger than you. People didn't know what it was like."
After he had returned home, McDade added how his experiences isolated him from his friends and neighbors he'd grown up with.
"They weren't in the military; they never did combat. These people that came out of a small town, Brigham City — they had never left home," McDade said. "I had moved on and they hadn't, and it was tough for me to really identify with them."
As time went on, McDade began having difficulties with alcoholism, anger management and marriage stressors. That was when he knew he had to make a change.
He applied to the PTSD program, and, with his wife present, finally began talking about his experiences.
"I finally tracked down some people that would listen to me, you know, friends of mine that I had that would listen to me and not be judgmental. Because a lot of times when you want to talk about it, it has built up so bad — and you need to get rid of it to talk about it," McDade said.
But talking about it isn't always easy, McDade said; not everyone is always kind when he or others talk about their past experiences. Some of his high school friends who served in Vietnam and pilots he'd flown with had even taken their own lives, McDade remembered.
To best get help, McDade recommends speaking with trusted loved ones and professionals who will listen with understanding — and if a veteran feels that they are in danger from themselves, he pleaded that they should "please make that call" to a hotline or a friend who can help.
In continuing to spread his message, McDade finds any chance he can get to ask his fellow veterans to get help, whether that be on a video series partnership with Utah television channel KUED, or at the SourceAmerica banquet.
"There's all sorts of helplines and hotlines out there," McDade said. "Please make that call to call somebody you know, and ask how they're doing. A family member or a friend."
After his partnership with KUED, McDade ran into a man in Home Depot, who thanked him, saying that because of him, he had gotten help for his PTSD.
Hopefully, McDade added, his speech at the SourceAmerica banquet may have influenced someone to talk about their experiences or to call a hotline when in a dangerous circumstance.
"Talking to 1,000 people down there (at the banquet) saying, 'Please make that call' — will it help them? Might it change somebody's attitude? I'll never know," McDade said.
Helping at Hill Air Force Base
McDade not only encourages veterans to seek mental health help, but he provides service as an engineering technician in the Ogden Air Logistics Complex's 309th Aircraft Maintenance Group handling millions of dollars of equipment at Hill Air Force Base.
There, he helps keep track of each piece of Air Force equipment from the smallest bolts to the largest trailers, keeping note of it in a large database. If anyone needs to find a piece of equipment, McDade can help.
"Really, his job saves the Air Force countless dollars and hours, and not just that — the military readiness to get aircraft in the air faster to support the Air Force's mission," said Thomas Ashton, a veteran who served in Iraq and is McDade's supervisor. "It's the type of job that requires that maturity and that autonomy."
The veteran had begun his service as a technician after Ashton had watched him work at C-A-L Ranch, unloading several pounds of feed and working tirelessly — despite being over 70 at the time.
That was when Ashton knew that Hill Air Force Base needed McDade's work ethic. And he has not disappointed; every day, McDade makes the place a little better, Ashton said.
"He's like what we wish every employee would be," Ashton said.
And McDade hasn't just improved the business; Ashton added that his friendship has influenced him for the better, especially because they bonded over their shared experiences as veterans.
"We understand each other. More like brothers," Ashton said. "That's really kind of where the friendship has come from, is a mutual understanding of things that we've gone through and being able to talk with each other."
And McDade's example has helped Ashton seek help on his own.
"Having someone like Terry, who understands — and it's such a good push for that kind of thing — helps me, you know, in the little everyday stuff, but also to encourage me to continue through this or similar programs that I'm able to do. He's been great," Ashton said.
'Taking care of his fellow Marines'
In fact, it was McDade's service capabilities and the ways he's helped his fellow veterans that inspired Ashton to originally nominate him for the award.
"He never talked with anybody about it, but he has a list of charities that he donates to every year and other places that he provides service to," Ashton said. "That's really where the whole essay that I put together for Terry came to was from just thinking about him as a whole person, not just as an employee, but as a whole person. It really coalesced down to that word — 'service.'"
McDade also helps the homeless, giving them some of his gloves and beanies, or engaging with them in conversation — especially because some of the homeless may be disabled veterans.
"I was going to make the world a better place for everybody to live in. And I try, not very successfully at times, but I try," McDade said.
Ashton noted that McDade deserved the national award not just because of his awareness and work ethic, but because of the way he's always looking to help veterans who are in greater need.
"He may have a uniform aside, but he hasn't put the mindset aside of taking care of his fellow Marines," Ashton said.
Suicide prevention resources
If you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide, call 988 to connect with the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline.
Crisis Hotlines
- Huntsman Mental Health Institute Crisis Line: 801-587-3000
- SafeUT Crisis Line: 833-372-3388
- 988 Suicide and Crisis LifeLine at 988
- Trevor Project Hotline for LGBTQ teens: 1-866-488-7386
Online resources
- NAMI Utah: namiut.org
- SafeUT: safeut.org
- Suicide Prevention Lifeline: www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
- American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, Utah chapter: afsp.org/chapter/utah