Estimated read time: 4-5 minutes
This archived news story is available only for your personal, non-commercial use. Information in the story may be outdated or superseded by additional information. Reading or replaying the story in its archived form does not constitute a republication of the story.
YESVILLE — As an exhausted working mother trying to navigate the schedules of three children, a husband and a dog, the most common word in my vocabulary on any given day is typically "no." So imagine the shock that rippled through my household when, for 24 hours, I forced myself to just say "yes" instead.
Admittedly, the concept is not a new one to our family. When my oldest daughter turned 8, we started the tradition of the Birthday Yes Date. Basically, the birthday kid gets a special one-on-one date with mom and dad over which they have complete control. Four different ice cream shops before dinner? Sure. Putting makeup on in Sephora (much to dad's dismay)? Of course! Big Gulp filled with Diet Coke for the 4-year-old? What the birthday kid wants, the birthday kid gets.
Our children have grown to love this tradition, but perhaps not as much as my husband and I do. We rarely get alone time with each individual child, and I always enjoy seeing what our kids spend their entire year coming up with. I've learned a lot about my kids through these dates — their likes, their fears, their interests. We're very into experiences over stuff anyway.
Another added perk: solid memory-making material. I could easily spout off every detail from each of these dates over the past four years, which to me is a gift that keeps on giving.
So when I heard the premise of Netflix's new film streaming now, "Yes Day," I immediately thought "been there, done that." In fact, I even kicked myself for not pitching the idea to studio execs myself.
But when we actually sat down to watch it as a family, it occurred to me that we'd never actually experienced a "Yes Day" all together. One on one, sure — but never three kids coming together to dream up the dreamiest 24 hours in our family history.
So, of course, I had to give it a shot.
In case you haven't seen the movie yet, here's the gist: a pair of uptight, overworked parents are challenged by their free-spirited children to engage in a "Yes Day," meaning the kids call the shots, and there are no "noes" allowed. The parents — played by Jennifer Garner and Edgar Ramirez — agree to consider it, but only if the kids work to earn it first.
I loved the concept of a "Yes Day" being a reward instead of a right. We adopted that contract in our own family "Yes Day" plans and watched our kids scramble to complete homework, make their beds, finish chores and get along. In an unexpected twist, I heard the word "yes" in place of the usual whine or protest much more frequently that week.
As the much-anticipated day finally arrived, our kids began to lay out their plans. To my surprise, most of their requests didn't even require us to leave our house. We definitely set some guidelines: nothing too expensive, no new pets, no crossing state lines, no tattoos. You know, the basics.
But I guess I had it in my head that my children would take the opportunity to be extravagant when really they just wanted donuts from our favorite bakery and bacon for breakfast (I never cook bacon), a movie-marathon morning, and board games.
We rode bikes in the rain, stopped for hot chocolate with extra whipped cream at Starbucks, and let them pick out a little keychain stuffed animal from our neighborhood drugstore. We played Minecraft together, ate pancakes with extra syrup for lunch, pulled out sleeping bags and watched a few more movies.
Instead of going out to dinner, the kids wanted to create a menu including their individual favorite dishes. Did you know that Lucky Charms pairs quite nicely with homemade barbecue chicken pizza and macaroni and cheese?
Here's the thing: Our "Yes Day" didn't cost much money. It didn't even require much work. But it really, truly felt good to say "yes" to each other — to say yes to silencing all the noise around us and truly focusing in on our family. It gave us 24 hours to remember how much we truly enjoy being together and how much we need each other, even after a year when "alone time" felt like a mythical unicorn: rare and hard to find.
I guess all this is to say, in a world full of distractions, saying "yes" to the people who are most important can feel very grounding. And the weird thing is, I catch myself saying it more than I have in a very long time.
