Local nonprofit featured on Dr. Phil seeks to rehabilitate victims of abuse in polygamy

SALT LAKE CITY — Warren Jeff’s nephew, Ian, is a former member of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. He is one of many victims of abuse who was able to escape and be helped by Holding Out HELP, a program that helps individuals who leave to escape abuse in polygamous cultures.

“When I was 15 years old, I got kicked out of the community because I was talking with girls and sneaking out of the house to hang out with unapproved friends,” Ian, whose last name was withheld, told Dr. Phil in an episode that aired Tuesday. “At that point, my dad drove me up to Salt Lake and signed power of attorney rights over to a host family, said goodbye, and that was it. Essentially, my dad threw me away. It was devastating for me.”

Ian’s story is fairly typical for some male members of the FLDS church. He said that he, like many other teens, was utilized for child labor and eventually excommunicated for not following rules closely enough.

“When I was in the FLDS, they went to extreme lengths to brainwash me,” he said on Dr. Phil. “Warren told me that I was never good enough, and if I didn’t follow what he said, I would burn in eternal misery without my family.”

Ian was one of many former members of the FLDS church who was taken in by Tonia Tewell, who started a program called Holding Out HELP. The nonprofit's mission, listed on its website, states, “Holding Out HELP provides those who come from a polygamous culture the resources needed to transition from isolation to independence.”

Tonia Tewell, Holding Out HELP's director, said that they serve between 150-250 people per year.

"A majority of those we serve come with nothing but the clothes on their backs, lack a high school education and suffer abuse," Tewell said. "We step in to provide a safe place where the basic needs of food, clothing, shelter and safety are met and then make plans for their future through education, job skills and counseling.”

Tewell was recently on the Dr. Phil Show discussing some important cases they’ve worked with and helping educate about sex trafficking and pedophilia among sects of the FLDS. She explained that she and her husband decided to start Holding Out HELP because of an experience in which they were invited to be a host family for a family of six transitioning out of polygamy. They were very “shocked by the gravity of what they dealt with.”

As of Saturday, they have helped “over 1,700 men, women and children” adjust into normal society and recover from negative experiences in the FLDS church.

Brief timeline of the FLDS:

• In 1890, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints suspended the practice of polygamy, CNN reported. Members who continued to practice polygamy were excommunicated.
• From 2002 until the present, Warren Jeffs has been the spiritual leader of the FLDS church, according to ABC. However, after Warren Jeff's incarceration (see bullet below) his brother, Lyle Jeffs, oversaw FLDS affairs. Before Warren Jeffs became the leader, his father, Rulon T. Jeffs, was the prophet of the group from 1986-2002.
• In 2011, Warren Jeffs was sentenced to life in prison for sexual assault of a child under the age of 14, and 20 years for sexual assault of a child under age 17, CNN reported. Jeffs is believed to have more than 70 wives.
• “The FLDS has an estimated 10,000 members, most of whom live in Colorado City, Arizona and Hildale, Utah,” according to CNN. “The group also has followers near Eldorado, Texas, and in South Dakota, Colorado, Nevada, British Columbia, and Mexico.”
• The FLDS consider their spiritual leader a prophet of God. He performs marriages and controls the familial lives of members of the faith. He can "punish followers by 'reassigning' their wives and children to other men," according to CNN.
• On Feb. 23, 2016, Lyle Jeffs and 10 other FLDS members were indicted for fraud and money laundering, according to CNN. Lyle Jeffs was placed on house arrest to await trial, but removed his FBI tracking bracelet and fled in June 2016. He was recaptured in June 2017 and sentenced to 57 months in a federal prison for food stamp fraud and escaping house arrest.
• According to ABC, members of the FLDS still follow Warren Jeffs as their prophet, despite him being in prison.

Women face a variety of challenges as members of the FLDS. They are given arranged marriages at young ages, often to men much older than them and whom they might be distantly related to, according to ABC News. Many report being abused both sexually and physically in those relationships.

Along with Ian, Holding Out HELP also assisted a young woman named Marrilynn, who escaped abuse in her FLDS community. She said she started being abused sexually when she was four or five years old “by family members, neighbors, and friends.” She said sometimes the abuse occurred "one at a time and sometimes it was in groups."

“Many times, I was told this is what God wanted, and, ‘If you had been more obedient and more submissive, it wouldn’t happen,’” Marrilynn said on Dr. Phil.

According to ABC, women also have to wear prairie dresses and cover their bodies completely. They are also told not to cut their hair, as they will need it "in heaven to wash men’s feet as an anointing."

Holding Out HELP seeks to help these individuals recover from their abuse and learn how to function in society.

“Our goal is to give them the skills they need to become self-sufficient and productive citizens in our society,” Tewell said. “Sadly, when they leave, most lose everything and everyone they’ve ever known and are told us outsiders are evil, and they are condemned to hell. So they land on our doorstep with very little hope. We assign a case manager and start the rehabilitation process. With the proper support, they can and will succeed.”

Tewell added that just because an individual lives polygamy does not mean they are abusers or that they refuse to educate their children.

“Holding Out HELP does not receive near the number of independents (which means they do not belong to a specific group) as we do those that come from closed communities," Tewell said. "Closed communities often allow opportunities for abuse and neglect to occur because they lack the proper checks and balances in place, thus there is no accountability or rehabilitation.”

Tewell said that the only way to better protect these men, women and children will be by prosecuting offenders for their crimes.

“Holding Out HELP is always looking for volunteers like tutors, mechanics, handymen, housing and financial donations,” Tewell said. “It is because of our faithful supporters, primarily here in Utah, that we can offer hope and healing.”

Holding Out HELP accepts donations on their website. They can be contacted on their hotline at 801-548-3492 and by email at help@holdingouthelp.org. *

*Disclaimer: KSL.com has not verified the accuracy of the information provided with respect to the account nor does KSL.com assure that the monies deposited will be applied for the benefit of the persons named as beneficiaries. If you are considering a deposit or donation you should consult your own advisers and otherwise proceed at your own risk.

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