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SALT LAKE CITY — A few weeks ago, I was scraping dishes, sweeping floors and scooping up toys while my husband was reading the news from the computer out loud (it’s how we get things done and get educated at the same time). He told me there was an article that included a survey listing the occupations that, if you held them, would make you the most and least well-rested.
I was interested, and 100 percent sure that motherhood would be on the list of occupations that get the least amount of rest. To my dismay, this is what I saw: home health aides, lawyers, police officers, physicians and paramedics, economists, social workers, computer programmers, financial analysts, plant operators, secretaries
“What?!” I asked open-mouthed. I looked over my husband’s shoulder to confirm that motherhood was not on the list.
“Maybe they don’t consider motherhood an occupation,” he said. He saw the look I gave him and made sure to emphasize the “they” part of his sentence.
“What?!” I said again. (I am so unrested that I often can’t come up with multiple answers per minute.)
Why isn’t it an occupation? I don’t care about any previous definition of the word, but motherhood should be included. No argument could make me think otherwise.
It is the little things that make the difference in our children long term. Because you can't measure those things, mothers are sort of relegated to be considered as high-end babysitters. That's not true. Mothering is the work of the ages. It is the most important thing that we could be doing.
–Jane Clayson Johnson, author
Then a couple of days after that, I came across an article from the Deseret News with the headline: "How much a homemaker is really worth." Still prickling over the survey from the days before, my interest was piqued.
The article broke down the most common jobs that a homemaker performs and came to the conclusion that a homemaker would make $96,261 a year. Again, what?! That’s a lot of money for doing something that isn’t considered an occupation.
Society today downplays and even discourages the role of a woman in the home and as a homemaker. I know homemakers don’t make the money that the article says we are worth, and the survey doesn’t consider what we do an occupation, but we are homemakers and mothers.
Jane Clayson Johnson talks a lot about her struggles with occupation and motherhood in her book, "I am a Mother." She expresses multiple times how people she meets are often embarrassed to say that they are a mother. They say it quietly and as if it means nothing. She herself used to be a prominent news anchor but still felt the pride and joy that came with saying that she was now a mother. She said she wanted to shout it to the world.
Clayton Johnson said, “The day-in-and-day-out of daily mothering is invisible, because so much of what we do doesn’t last, and we do it within the walls of our own home where it is not noticed. I traded in fancy lunches and fancy restaurants for something better. Still, there is no one to tap me or any mother on the back and say, ‘terrific diaper change.’ There’s no praise or recognition for the day-in-and-day-out of mothering. It is the little things that make the difference in our children long term. Because you can’t measure those things, mothers are sort of relegated to be considered as high-end babysitters. That’s not true. Mothering is the work of the ages. It is the most important thing that we could be doing."
I don’t end the day checking my bank account to see my daily earnings roll in. Mothers get paid in kisses and thank-you’s and in the joy we get when our child finally gets the moo and the baa with the right animal.
I am trained to hear my child's cry while in the biggest crowd or the deepest sleep. I can multitask and clean bathrooms while playing patty cake and singing ABC's. ... My occupation? Mother.
I admit, there are times at the end of the day when I think to myself, “I know I always wanted to be a mother, but what was I thinking? Why did I think I could do this? Why did I think I could be trusted with these little souls and be in charge of loving and teaching and raising them?”
I am ashamed to admit that sometimes at the end of the day I am tired of doing things for other people. The kids are in bed and I want to get in my comfy jammies and turn off my brain and do something totally indulgent. Then one child needs to use the bathroom, one child needs a second nightlight, and the baby needs to eat. I drag my exhausted body on to one more task, and to the next, and I keep on going.
Mothers work 24 hours a day. I am trained to hear my child’s cry while in the biggest crowd or the deepest sleep. I can multitask and clean bathrooms while playing patty cake and singing ABC’s. I drive the kids around, try to keep my house clean and organized, and I am a security guard in breaking up some pretty mean fights.
I may not be the best at every individual job because it isn’t the only job I am doing, but I get to all of them. And most days I’d like to think that my kids are happy and well fed and feeling loved. Even on those days when I am finally sinking into my mattress at 11:00 at night, I recognize that this is the most fulfilling job that I have ever had. I have never worked harder or felt more important for the job that I have been given.
My occupation? Mother.
Tara Creel is a Logan native and mother of three boys. Contact her at taracreel@gmail.com.
