Estimated read time: 6-7 minutes
This archived news story is available only for your personal, non-commercial use. Information in the story may be outdated or superseded by additional information. Reading or replaying the story in its archived form does not constitute a republication of the story.
SALT LAKE CITY — When Aaron Bryant was 14, his dad died. The event, he says, put his life into a tailspin. For 10 years, he says, he used drugs, especially methamphetamine. He lived on the streets for about half that time.
The details his journey from homeless meth addict to drug counselor and social worker in his book, A Synchronous Memoir of Addiction and Recovery.
Here are excerpts of his interview:
On his recovery: Many people ask me what was my ‘ah ha' moment or what turned it around. Although I don't know that there was any one specific thing, I would say having the time to get substances out of your body in jail and to kind of ponder on what's occurred while you're in jail helps. But while I was in CATS (Correction Addiction Treatment Services at the Salt Lake County Jail), the opportunity to process my father's death for the first time kind of was the beginning of some emotional healing.
"I don't think I'm the norm, to kind of just quit and abstain, no relapses the first time. But I also think I had some opportunities that are not the norm, either.
"So, I had the opportunity to be incarcerated. Sounds like an oxymoron but for a significant amount of time, and to immediately be put into a supportive home environment, coupled by employment opportunity and school and the ability to achieve and work toward something better."
On earning associate, bachelor's and master's degrees, preparing to start a graduate degree in public policy, and being a single dad and full-time counselor: "Sometimes it feels like I'm trying to play catch-up because there's a lot of missed years and I feel like there was a lot of missed potential for me. It feels like my need to achieve so many things academically and professionally are a desire to catch up and get to where I could have been.
"It feels good, where I'm at today, based on where I was. Sometimes it's hard for me to think because it really was not that many years ago. But to be graduating with a master's degree and have all these other things when six years ago, the last time I was being arrested, I was homeless, living on the streets in clothes that I had been wearing for probably a few days, with just a backpack on my shoulder full of junk and basically strung out on drugs. To be on the whole opposite end of the spectrum is a little surreal for me."
On what he'll tell his now 3-year-old daughter: "I hope to be fairly open about what I've gone through, details, depending. My book is available. The book is there for her to access. But being open about what I've gone through and hopefully draw on my life experience to generate dialogue with my daughter."
You have blinders on and all you can see is drugs.
–Aaron Bryan
He made the decision to literally live on the streets, and pointed out to us where he used to stay.
"Sleeping outdoors, over in these little alleys here. Two houses right here, we used to stay in one of them. This is one of the places we would get food, is out of these dumpsters here."
He says he used methamphetamine every day.
"I was arrested for assault, theft, trespassing. You have blinders on and all you can see is drugs."
His mother eventually got a restraining order. He says he was a "pretty cold distant and fairly angry, angry individual."
"I was pretty lost, things were really dark. There wasn't much light left in me at the end."
The last time he was arrested, he says "kind of was the most relieved I'd been in a long time. It was kind of all over."
"A significant amount of time was necessary, just to get my mind and body healed, the opportunity to process my father's death for the first time."
He says witnessing recovery can be a truly beautiful thing. It helped create hope for him.
"Recovery … initially was like exciting for me," he said. "It was kind of like a new world for me. My first semester in college was invigorating -- sociology, psychology, humanities, writing. Knowledge is something that was very important to me. It's re-embracing my desire to know more and to learn more."
I was pretty lost, things were really dark. There wasn't much light left in me at the end.
–Aaron Bryant
He says he's now a licensed substance abuse counselor and has a licensed social service worker's license. He works with treatment groups, life skills groups, a lot of clients that are in a housing program.
He is a single father of a daughter that will turn 4 in July. "(It's) one of the most wonderful experiences as well as obviously challenging," he said.
He doesn't plan to keep much from he as she grows and comes to understand what he went through as an addict.
"I hope to be fairly open about what I've gone through, details, depending. My book is available," he said. "The book is there for her to access. But being open about what I've gone through and hopefully draw on my life experience to generate dialogue with my daughter."
He says that people often ask him what helped him turn it around. "Although I don't know that there was any one specific thing I would say, having the time to get substances out of your body in jail and to kind of ponder on what's occurred while you're in jail helps."
While he was in treatment, he says he also had the time to begin processing his father's death for the first time, which lead to significant emotional healing.
Unlike most people recovering from meth, he says he never had a relapse.
"I don't think I'm the norm, to kind of just quit and abstain, no relapses the first time," He said. "But I also think I had some opportunities that are not the norm, either. So I had the opportunity to be incarcerated. Sounds like an oxymoron, but for a significant amount of time, and immediately, to be put into a supportive home environment, coupled by employment opportunity and school and the ability to achieve and work toward something better."
Even though he has enjoyed success in recovery, he also feels the pull of lost time and lost opportunities that he'll never get back.
"Sometimes it feels like I'm trying to play catch-up because there are a lot of missed years, and I feel like there was a lot of missed potential for me," he said. "It feels like my need to achieve so many things academically and professionally are a desire to catch up and get to where I could have been."
"Life is more difficult now than it was while I was using, constantly going to school and work. My stress level's fairly high. (But) life is better, the benefit is there, the benefit outweighs the cost," he said. -->
