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SALT LAKE CITY -- Generally speaking, humans are cowards, in my opinion. We try to avoid confrontation if at all possible. But not having to look someone in the eye magically gives a person a feeling of safety, and they lose their natural inhibitions and can say anything they want. It's like a mischievous little kid when his parents aren't around.
We live in an age of electronic communication. I would guess that 75 percent of all communication takes place over the telephone, email or text. With all of the modern conveniences available to us, we sometimes lose sight of the fact that even though we are communicating electronically, we are still communicating with real people.
For my job, I talk to people on the phone all day. For the most part, people are relatively intelligent and civilized. However, I have come to realize that people treat phone conversations differently than they do face-to-face conversations.
Go against what society is teaching you and smile at someone for no reason. Instead of picking a fight, pick up a Hallmark card and give it to the first person you see. Instead of telling someone off, tell them a joke and make them laugh.
For example, when I speak with someone face-to-face and the conversation is over, I say, "Goodbye," to end the conversation, then go on my way. I do the same thing on the phone and say, "Goodbye," before hanging up.
But a lot of people on the phone don't do that; They simply hang up. I highly doubt they would simply stop talking then abruptly turn and walk away at the end of a face-to-face chat, so why do it on the phone?
People are also much more courageous and aggressive on the phone or via email than they are in person. They feel that they can yell and scream and cuss you out all they want on the phone, but it's a safe assumption they would never dare to say 90 percent of that to your face. Sitting behind a computer screen makes it much easier to belittle someone than it would be if they were standing in your office where you could see -- or possibly feel -- their reaction.
Of course, there are exceptions to every rule.
There are people out there who simply don't care what others think about them, nor do they care about other people's feelings. Courtesy is a foreign word they have heard about from a friend of a friend that they haven’t experienced or shared with anyone. They also think tact is something you use to hang a picture on.
I realize that most people assume that chivalry is dead and gone, so manners and common courtesy are next. But I say chivalry is still alive and well. Courtesy and manners are still valued concepts, and respect is not just a catchy song. Join me in the revolution to treat people nicely.
Go against what society is teaching you and smile at someone for no reason. Instead of picking a fight, pick up a Hallmark card and give it to the first person you see. Instead of telling someone off, tell them a joke and make them laugh.
Walk up to someone on the street and tell them that your day just got brighter thanks to seeing their shining face. Then smile, remember to say, "Goodbye," and walk away whistling. That will give them something to think about for the rest of the day.
Let's all try to be nice to just one person every day for no reason other than the fact that we can. It will come back to you some day when you need it most.
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Eric Sachs is the father of 3 and recently became a grandfather.
