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Tonya Papanikolas Reporting When it comes to something like betrayal, you probably don't have to look hard to find someone with a personal experience. Some betrayals are harsher than others and cause a bigger impact, like in the case of Mark Hacking.
Thelma Soares said last Monday she felt shattered and betrayed to the very core because her daughter was killed by the man who made covenants to love and protect her. Interestingly, a new book is coming out next month called "Shattered." Thelma Soares wrote the foreword.
At Mark Hacking's sentencing hearing his mother-in-law, Thelma Soares, spoke openly about Hacking's betrayal. In a statement she said, "I loved that young man as if he were my own son, so his betrayal is profound."
Fay Klingler, Co-Author of "Shattered”: “She'll feel that for a very long time. She'll probably feel that the rest of her life."
Fay Klinger co-authored the book "Shattered", which details six steps to help people recover from betrayal.
Fay Klingler: “Anyone who has experienced betrayal from the simple to the major go through those same steps."
The steps include becoming aware of the betrayal, taking action and learning to stand up for yourself, and advancing your life and moving forward toward your goals. But that can be hard if you've been severely betrayed.
Dorann Mitchell, Licensed Clinical Social Worker: “The most significant thing that happens in betrayal is we end up having trouble trusting ourselves."
In the Hacking case, Lori's family didn't know about Mark's lies and betrayals until it was too late.
Dorann Mitchell: “Often we, in the name of our love and care and concern for another person, overlook the red flags."
But the book's co-authors say if you keep your eyes open, you can always see signs.
Bettyanne Bruin, Co-Author of "Shattered": “Defensiveness. In a normal, healthy relationship, a person should be able to ask a reasonable question and get a reasonable answer."
A betrayer may also rationalize his or her behavior, manipulate or transfer guilt.
Bettyanne Bruin: “They actually turn it around and say, you think I have a problem. You have a bigger problem."
These women say they've been betrayed themselves and it is possible to heal.
Fay Klingler: “Life can become sweet again."
Thelma Soares wrote one of the forewords to this book. In it she said her heart goes out to all those who find themselves in a situation like Lori's and hoped they had the courage and fortitude to take the steps to protect themselves against betrayal.
