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SALT LAKE CITY — I stood in the doorway of the garage, still in my pajamas. My husband was loading our daughter into his sedan. He was running carpool this morning — a rare luxury for me.
Carpool is always my job. But today was a little different, and we had a plan in place.
I watched as he put his key in the ignition, and all I heard was, “click-click-click-click-click.” Nothing. The car didn’t turn over.
We tried to adjust the battery cables and give it a jump start. Still nothing. The clock was ticking.
He was 45 minutes away from work. We had two kids we had to get to school and a doctor’s appointment in a few hours.
It was time to call an audible.
The audible explained
Unless you’re a football fan, you may not even know what I’m talking about. Calling an audible is a football term every mom needs to understand — not so she can become a better spectator, but because there's parental value in learning to “call an audible.”
Next time the game is on, watch a little closer. We can learn something from a quarterback.
But as the quarterback looks up, he realizes the defensive alignment is not what he was expecting and — at the very last minute — adjusts his entire plan by yelling out a new play: an audible.
It’s fourth down. Your favorite team is just yards away from the end zone. The offense huddles and calls the next play. It breaks and heads toward the line of scrimmage.
But as the quarterback looks up, he realizes the defensive alignment is not what he was expecting and — at the very last minute — adjusts his entire plan by yelling out a new play: an audible.
All the players respond to his call and change the plan of attack.
They snap the ball, cross the goal line and score a touchdown.
Football is a game of strategy — a game of offense and defense. The quarterback is key in strategically leading the team to a win every game.
Life is strategic
Now motherhood is definitely no powderpuff game, but it is completely full of strategy. Our days are packed with work and school and homework. There is a house to clean and people to feed. We volunteer, we serve, and we support our children in extracurricular activities. We can become over-scheduled. But even if we are not, life requires balance and strategy to make it through each busy day.
Be the quarterback
We are the quarterbacks of our families. We huddle our team and come up with a plan. And when that plan looks like it might fail, we change it.
You call audibles all the time. You probably just think you are being flexible or rolling with the punches, but there is serious strategy to motherhood. It’s important to recognize these decisions are strategic to the play and not just happenstance.
Don't just roll with the punches, choose to change the play and go for the win. This will give you a sense of control even when you have none.
Be proactive rather than reactive to situations that arise. Don’t just roll with the punches, choose to change the play and go for the win. This will give you a sense of control even when you have none. It means you have chosen to change with the circumstances, not letting the circumstances change you.
See the difference?
You win some, you lose some
So this morning we changed our plan. We called a tow truck and two neighbors helped shuttle kids to school. I spent over three hours in the car, driving back and forth as we got everyone where they needed to be and home again.
Plans can change, doctors' appointments can be rescheduled, neighbors can be valuable resources.
We ate fast food for lunch and dinner because it was just one of those days. Then as my husband and I were wrapping up the evening, we agreed we were excited for a new day tomorrow — maybe one that goes a little more according to plan.
Today may have been a loss. But tomorrow — tomorrow I have a feeling will be a win.
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*Nicole Carpenter is the founder of www.MOMentity.com and the creator of The MOMentity Process. She is a communications consultant, writer and speaker. She and her husband are raising four children, 7 years and younger, including twin toddlers.**
