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PROVO — When I was 11 years old, I was informed that I was a racist.
It's safe to say, it caught me off guard. I wasn’t even old enough to grasp the concept of judging another based on the color of their skin or the way they choose to live their life. Quite frankly, I’m not sure I had ever even heard the term before; certainly not in such an invasive and personal manner.
Nonetheless, that is what I was told by a student at my new school on the east coast after my family had relocated there in 1990 from Salt Lake City. His reasoning?
I came from a Mormon family.
Period, end of story, bottom line. That was enough for him to brand me as a racist. No further explanation was needed.
So why am I telling you this?
I’ll get there.
I have always been of the opinion that this world would be a much better place if we could all make a few subtle changes about they way we operate on a day-to-day basis.
First off, we as a society have reached an incredible level of political correctness and ridiculous sensitivity concerning just about everything.
Confucius is credited with coining the phrase, "He who takes offense when none is intended is a fool. He who takes offense when offense is intended is a bigger fool.”
Most people are so easily offended, oftentimes you lose track of what’s acceptable and what must be avoided at all costs when opening your mouth.
Solution: Lighten up and don’t take things so personally.
Secondly, if something is unfamiliar or different to us, we are afraid of it. Even worse, we back away from people who are not like we are, who don’t hold the same belief system as we do, and often we won’t take the time to try and learn where the other person may be coming from. This leads to gross miscommunication and instant judging of others, even subconsciously. It breeds hate and misunderstanding.
Solution: Accept others for who they are and what they believe. Don’t be afraid to open your mind to other possible ways of life. Give others the benefit of the doubt and allow them their personal avenues to happiness.
And maybe a bunch of white boys out there go down and beat up on an SEC team, a big, physical team like (Ole Miss).
–- Daniel Sorensen, BYU football player
Lastly, I am often baffled at how little self-awareness many people I come in contact with contain. Sometimes I am convinced most people don’t even realize what they say, what they do and the effect it has on others. We are all guilty of this on some level.
Solution: Think before you speak, think before you act and do your best to acknowledge when you’re wrong — or at least make allowance for why others may perceive that you could be wrong.
So, am I writing a dissertation based off of teachings by Don Miguel Ruiz, or is this a sports column?
It’s the latter. Here’s why.
Earlier this week, BYU Safety Daniel Sorensen had this to say to the Provo Daily Herald:
"The purpose of BYU, why we're here and why we're playing — and where we're trying to go with this program. It kind of fires you up. It kind of gets you excited."To go out there and play for a specific purpose of showing people that we're playing for more than football. This is a faith-based university and we're trying to represent that. The players, and the flag bearers.
"What if we go out there and dominate (at Ole Miss, Sept. 3) and people start seeing us? And they put us on the map, and we're on ESPN.And they start wondering who these kids are — what are they doing with their lives, and why are they so good?
"And maybe a bunch of white boys out there go down and beat up on an SEC team, a big, physical team like (Ole Miss). If we go in there and dominate, what does that say? It starts raising questions and curiosity.”
I intentionally put two separate pieces of Daniel’s quote in bold; they were the two snippets of the quote that garnered the most reaction.
A hundred of you could read that, and most likely have a hundred different reactions. We discussed it on The Bill and Spence Show this week, and yes, reactions were all across the board.
Some were offended by Sorensen boldly wearing his religious beliefs on his sleeve, and insinuating that playing for BYU is part of a bigger plan; That playing football at BYU means you are carrying the mantle of a much larger message. Some interpret this as BYU folk believing they are better than others, because of their belief system. Some latched on to the term “White Boys” and painted Daniel a racist.
If you fall in one of these two groups, you, a) are far too easily offended, and/or b) lack understanding of what Sorensen and the rest of the BYU football team is taught (or, for that matter, what the rest of the LDS religion is taught).
As I said earlier, I’m not saying you must agree with Sorensen or his teammates, but I am saying you should try to understand where they are coming from.
According to the folks at BYU, everything they do is indeed about spreading a message to people around the world, football included. And thank the good Lord we live in a country that allows them both to believe that, and provide the freedom of speech for them to express it. When you understand, right wrong or indifferent, that they truly believe they are carrying the mantle for a message, a message that they are encouraged to share with others every chance they get, then what is there to be angry about? Taking away one’s right to express themselves is contrary to what this country was founded upon. Let’s not forget that.
And calling those comments racist is a blatant insult to those who have suffered real, tangible, terrifying racial injustices in their lives. Let’s have some perspective here.
And finally, to bring it back around, I learned at an early age that there are people out there who believe (again, right or wrong, perception is reality) that the LDS Church is a racist institution. BYU and the state of Utah are comprised of predominantly white students and citizens. There’s no arguing that. Additionally, there is a perception that exists that BYU believes God is on their side when it comes to everything, football included (see Austin Collie’s comments after BYU beat Utah in 2007), which can paint BYU in a less-than-flattering light to those who are leading happy and healthy lives, adhering to their own separate code of conduct.
Because of this, like it or not, Daniel Sorensen and the rest of the BYU student body would be well served to exercise a little more self-awareness when it comes to making these comments. When the stigma is already attached to your institution, why fuel the flames? Let others live their lives in the manner in which they choose, and continue to proclaim what you believe to be the truth. I can respect that.
For me, I had no problem with what Sorensen said, because I know what he is taught to believe and I know that the LDS Church does not teach to judge others based on race. And who are we in the media to get frustrated with the same old boring sound bites, then crucify a kid when he speaks from the heart? It’s hypocritical.
I have no problem with people who choose to be offended (and it is a choice), because they probably don’t agree with or understand the dynamic of “every member a missionary,” and may have already painted BYU in a certain light, which can never be changed.
My hope is at the end of the day, situations like this teach us all to co-exist on a more healthy and happy level because of, not despite, our differences. It’s what makes the world a beautiful place.
So let’s not allow ourselves to be so easily offended. Let's try to understand where others are coming from, even if we don’t agree, and let’s practice a little more self-awareness when choosing to speak.
And finally, let’s play some football.
