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Contrary to recent celebrity news reports, there might be times when it's OK to not wear panties. But it's not OK to be photographed in the act.
Alas, Britney and Paris and Lindsay did not get the memo.
They are surely not the only members of the Hollywood pantyless brigade, but Hilton, Spears and Lohan are the ones who repeatedly proved it in recent months by wearing hyper-short skirts and clumsily getting out of cars in front of paparazzi. Now pictures of their genitalia are all over on the Internet.
Even the fashion tribe is appalled: They insist it's not fashionable to "go commando."
"You might go without underwear under tights or jeans, but not with the intention of being public about it," says Linda Wells, editor of Allure magazine. "It's common not to wear underwear with exercise clothes, but that doesn't mean you won't put them on when you go to work."
Nor will most ordinary women follow the Hilton/Spears/Lohan lead.
"It's not a trend," declares Rebecca Aspan, author of The Lingerie Handbook and owner of La Petite Coquette lingerie boutique in New York. She tells women to stop wearing underwear -- baggy, saggy, ripped underwear -- and start wearing lingerie. She certainly doesn't mean stop wearing underwear entirely. "I've always believed less is more -- you show a little lace, that's provocative," she says. "If you show everything, that leaves nothing to the imagination, and then it's just shock value."
But there are certain situations when going pantyless might be necessary -- say, if you're wearing a clingy or skin-tight gown on a Hollywood red carpet. But not when the paparazzi can see up the dress.
"Women have been going commando under skirts since skirts were invented -- it puts a little extra pep in your step," says Clinton Kelly, co-host of TLC's What Not to Wear. He does not include panties in the category of what not to wear. "Most women I know are smart enough to keep their skirts from riding up and/or keep their legs together when confronted with a swarm of paparazzi."
Smart is not what Hilton, Spears and Lohan are famous for. And "demure is something these particular women are not," says Sass Brown, assistant professor of fashion design at the Fashion Institute of Technology in New York. "It's not uncommon for women to not wear underwear with certain styles and then to become comfortable going without. Those three epitomize the wild, I-don't-care kind of celebrity. They're not terribly worried about the odd nude photo." Phillip Bloch, a top Los Angeles fashion stylist, says he can "sort of" understand why a model on a fashion shoot might show up without panties, but he hates it when male models do it. "There's a fine line between going out and being around the paparazzi, and doing it on a fashion set," he says. "There are things you know you can't do as a celebrity -- it's part of the pact you make with the devil."
Another memo the panty-free girls didn't get. Bloch, like most fashion types, has no doubt what they're doing is deliberate -- for attention or as a blatant sexual come-on to men around them. "No one really admires it or respects it, we just talk about it. And just because we're talking doesn't mean we think it's right."
How did we get here? Sharon Stone did it in 1992's Basic Instinct but she was playing a character and it was pertinent to the plot. Wells cites the ubiquity of nude thongs and G-strings, the popularity of Brazilian waxes, and the fact that jeans have gotten tighter and lower (leading to visible thong lines). "There's little else left to do (that's shocking)," Wells says. "That doesn't mean everyone is going to throw away their underwear."
By the way, men go without all the time. At a party for Wells' new book, Allure: Confessions of a Beauty Editor, designers Tom Ford and Zac Posen admitted they frequently go without underwear . But paparazzi typically don't care what's up their skirts.
And the companies that sell sexy underwear? Frederick's of Hollywood and Victoria's Secret had no desire to comment. Karen Bromley, spokeswoman for the Intimate Apparel Council, was not so reticent. "Disgusting," she muttered.
But fashionable? "I hope not."
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