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Paul Nelson reportingMany teens struggle with being popular, but maybe they don't need to struggle so hard. A new study says popularity may be all in the teen's mind.
Today is the final day at Butler Middle School. Students' minds aren't really on their studies right now. Matter of fact, the partying started yesterday after class.
The social hierarchies and cliques could change as soon as today.
Molly Ringwald in the movie "Sixteen Candles" said, "A lot could happen over a year. You could come back next fall as a completely normal person."
Butler Middle School counselor Tatiana Grant said, "That happens a lot, and I don't know what happens over the summer. We have students that throw parties so they'll become popular."
Maybe teens can save their parents' money by holding off on the party. Popularity may not matter as much as teens may think. A new study by the University of Virginia says it doesn't matter if a child is popular; it just matters if the child thinks he's popular.
The study says teens who felt comfortable with their social standing functioned better socially. Grant says this sounds about right. "Because you think you're so popular, it kind of does good for yourself internally and your self-esteem," she said.
The study also revealed some teens who think they're popular aren't really as high on the food chain as they may believe. Grant says most of the teens who are preoccupied with being cool seem to suffer academically because of it. "They have their tardies. They skip school to be popular and go out and do whatever," she said.
But sometimes a teen could be well-liked by peers and still be under the impression that no one likes them.
Licensed clinical social worker Andra Devaiah said, "That really inhibits their confidence, their ability to make friends, to go into new situations and to relate to adults."
But Devaiah says there are times when the teen's feeling of unpopularity is completely justified. "Sometimes people really don't like them. Maybe they don't have the social skills. Maybe they don't have the interest or the way to relate to people, so sometimes we'll work on that," she said.
Devaiah says there's a fine line between a child being confident in his or her popularity and a child deluding himself or herself of their social status. But she says the teen's self-perception is the most important thing.
E-mail: pnelson@ksl.com
