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When you love someone, it's important to tell them how you feel — but they don't just want your words. They want actions to back them up. After all, in the book "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People," Stephen R. Covey famously wrote, "Love is a verb."
It probably won't surprise you to learn that it's not so much the grand gestures or expensive gifts that make people feel loved. It's the little stuff — the everyday acts — that add up. If you need a little inspiration, here are seven ways to say "I love you" without having to speak at all.
Do the dirty work
You may have heard or seen the phrase, "I like hugs. I like kisses. But what I really love is help with the dishes." Not only does this make for clever wall art in your kitchen, but they're words to live by if you hope to have a long and happy relationship.
In 2007, the Pew Research Center conducted a survey about what makes a marriage successful and the results are eye-opening. Around 62% of participants said that sharing household chores was very important for marital success. That outranked adequate income, good housing, shared religious beliefs, shared interests, agreement on politics — and even children.
So, the next time your spouse is mad at you, don't just buy them flowers. Roll up your sleeves and start scrubbing those dishes!
Relinquish control
If you're a type A personality who always has to have things your way, maybe take your foot off the gas and let your significant other drive. Instead of clicking through an endless list of Netflix options before you agree on something, give them the remote and let them pick whatever they want. Let them load the dishwasher any way they please. This is a helpful principle for all kinds of relationships — not just romantic ones.
"Inasmuch as trying to control everything makes you more critical of yourself and other people, giving up that control enables you to connect with others on deeper levels," Ariane Resnick writes for Verywell Mind. "That's because you aren't tying your love and acceptance for yourself and others on specific outcomes."
Resnick adds that "simply letting people be how they are" actually enables you to "love more freely."
Don't nitpick
Sometimes staying silent truly is the best way to show your love — particularly if you have a penchant for focusing on your loved one's flaws. In most cases, people are fairly aware of their shortcomings and mistakes. They don't need you to berate them for burning the toast, breaking a dish or forgetting to pick up the dry cleaning.
In another article for Verywell Mind, Sheri Stritof writes, "Instead of nitpicking your partner, focus on being kind and learning to accept their quirks and habits. Assessing your own needs and emotions can help you address your feelings without nitpicking."
Put the phone away
You don't need to be a relationship expert to understand how damaging it can be when someone is more interested in their electronic devices than their loved ones. And yet, all too often conversations are interrupted by pinging cell phones that vie for your attention. Whether you're on a date, at the dinner table or climbing into bed at night, putting that phone out of reach — or better yet, on silent — is a great way to show where your priorities are.
Pay attention
When you ignore a plant, it dies. The same thing happens in a relationship. You've got to show up in both the big matters and the small ones. You might think this is a repeat of the last point, but paying attention requires more than merely removing distractions. It means actively listening when they sigh and tell you about the long day they had. It means rubbing their shoulders when they're tensing up over a work project. It means bringing them an ice-cold drink when they're out working in the yard.
"The little things in relationships can be constant reminders that your partner thinks of you and cares about you," Hope Gillette writes for Psych Central.
Keep flirting
While most of these tips apply to any kind of relationship, this is one specifically for couples. No matter how long you've been together, never stop flirting. There are plenty of ways to do this nonverbally, too. Hold hands during a movie, play their favorite song, initiate a spontaneous dance party after dinner in the kitchen — just have fun!
Wrap them up in comfort
Finally, if your sweetheart's love language is receiving gifts, you can't go wrong with a luxuriously soft Minky Couture blanket. Minky's signature snuggly fabrics are made with love and built to last, so your loved one will have a constant reminder of just how much you care about them. Find the perfect gift that says "I love you" by shopping the whole collection on the Minky Couture website.
