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Toby Talbot, AP Photo

Mayo-makeup: Heinz Ketchup tries to bond with Jazz fans

By Ryan Miller, | Posted - Jul 25th, 2019 @ 8:05pm

SALT LAKE CITY — There are some things Utahns hold sacred.

And, yes, some are pretty superficial. Heinz Ketchup found that out on Thursday.

The popular condiment company already wasn’t on the best of terms with many in Utah because of its choice to market a ketchup and mayonnaise combination as “Mayochup” last year. True Utahns, of course, know the correct name: fry sauce.

On Thursday, though, after close to a year of hearing about how they have stolen the beloved Utah condiment, Heinz appeared to have snapped.

After once again getting called out on Twitter for taking credit for the sauce (as well as their sauce’s names in general — ”Kranch”? Really?), the official Heinz Ketchup account fired back with a tweet that read, “The same way Utah acts like it came up with Jazz.”

First, the company came for fry sauce. Now, it's coming after the Utah Jazz.

Welp, it's been fun, Heinz. Time to stop all shipments to Utah — the company is canceled here. Heck, we are more of catsup people anyways, right?

But, wait, before Utah could officially make Hunt’s the official ketchup of the state (Lt. Gov. Spencer Cox is an avid Jazz fan after all), a story of how Heinz tried to become Utah’s favorite ketchup unfolded.

In one of the not-so-happy replies to tweet, a Jazz fan suggested Heinz to “go home.”

“I would but too excited about (Mike) Conley,” Heinz responded.

And so it began.

For hours, the Heinz Twitter account pandered to the Jazz fan base. Or maybe it was just a fan showing their true colors. Hey, there is some red in those City jerseys.

Heinz tweeted about Mehmet Okur (“We like the Jazz. I have an Okur jersey”).

It tweeted about Rudy Gobert (“Was worried you were going to Block me like the Stifle Tower or the French Rejection”).

And even referenced Matt Harpring and Andrei Kirilenko (“Just game recognizing game. Like Harpring guarding AK47 in practice...”).

The account even apologized for the original tweet, referencing the famous blowup between Deron Williams and Jerry Sloan, tweeting: “A thousand apologies. Like Dwill eventually said to Jerry. ‘I'm sorry. I was wrong. You're right.’”

When questioned how the company knew so much about the Jazz, Heinz responded by fan-companying out on the current Jazz roster.

“Why is (Joe) Ingles so silky? Why is Gobert so punishing? Why is Conley going to be the perfect fit? Sometimes Greatness just happens. Like our delicious ketchup,” Heinz tweeted.

Or, more accurately, like fry sauce.

And even Heinz admitted its Mayochup is nothing compared to the original — at least in Utah.

“Fry Sauce is still number 1 in Utah. We didn't steal it. We're not like Stockton on 2/12/91,” Heinz tweeted.

Feb. 12, 1991, is when Stockton set a career-high nine steals in a game. It’s also likely when plenty of Utahns were enjoying some burgers or fries with fry sauce — decades before Heinz came out with their version.

Utahns won't claim they came up with jazz. But they sure will take credit for the creation of fry sauce.

Ryan Miller

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