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Many a grown woman has found herself uttering the title of Sandra Reishus' book "Oh, No! I've Become My Mother" (McGraw-Hill, $14.95 paper). The question Reishus has for these women is, Isn't it time you got around to becoming yourself?
The obstacle for many women, writes Reishus, a relationship coach, is what she calls the "mom gene" - those traits, good or bad, that they share with their mothers. You may love and admire your mother very much, but Reishus says that to find your true path in life, especially in relationships, you need to step out from her shadow.
The bulk of the book details how certain mom types affect their daughters' relationships, attitudes about aging and sex lives. But, although the mother-daughter dynamic certainly provides more than a book's worth of material, Reishus doesn't even make a passing acknowledgment that fathers, too, have something of an impact on their daughters' relationships and sexuality. It's a small but significant omission that does no service to mothers, fathers or daughters.
No one is safe! "Anyone who denies being like her mother just might be given the shock of her life to find out that Mom was somewhere in there all along."
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(c) 2006, Chicago Tribune. Distributed by Knight Ridder/Tribune News Service.
