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SALT LAKE CITY — Claudia was exhausted. Coming home from the hospital after giving birth to her third child a week ago and trying to take care of two young children while her husband works hard to keep his job is challenging to say the least. The baby is hungry, the children want her attention and some breakfast, and the laundry is piling up.
The phone rings and its Laura, Claudia’s friend. Laura is calling to see how she is doing, and Claudia, trying to sound calm, starts to cry and tells Laura how difficult the last few days have been. They talk for a while and Laura promises to come visit that day. As she hangs up the phone, Claudia sighs and feels much better. The door bell rings and Laura is at the door ready to help.
This scenario is not unusual for many women. We have great responsibilities in raising our children and keeping our household running smoothly, and there is always a need for a helping hand. Those who choose outside-the-home careers need a listening ear as well. Women need women to help each other with their responsibilities.
This is not a new idea. We read in scripture stories of women helping other women: Ruth helping Naomi, the pharaoh’s daughter keeping Miriam to take care of Moses and the closeness of Mary and Martha, Jesus’ friends. Mary the mother of Jesus spent three months visiting and helping her cousin Elizabeth.
It used to be that women were at home more — hanging up laundry, spending their days with their children, or visiting neighbors. These activities allowed for women to talk and listen to each other. In this bustling, busy, modern world, we don’t have as much time to talk to each other. Talking and listening helps find solutions to problems and we all need a listening ear once in a while.
Here are four good ways women can connect with other women to form friendships:
- Look around your home: Finding neighbors with the same circumstances and needs is a great way to connect with other women. Even those women who are older or younger than yourself still need a listening ear and want to talk. The convenience of neighbors close by is a great blessing and it’s nice to have someone you can count on in your neighborhood.
- Attend church: When we attend church, we find other women who feel the need for connecting with each other. We can form friendships through the service we give. Attending church is a great way to meet other women in the same circumstance as ourselves.
- Co-workers: If we are working away from home, this is a great opportunity to find a listening ear or a woman who needs a listening ear. Even with volunteer work, there are many women with whom we can connect in forming friendships which will last a life time.
- Community clubs: There are many organizations which allow women to interact through the same interest. Whether we write, watch birds, quilt or sing, there is an enormous amount of support in getting together with those who have the same interests as we do. Senior Citizen’s clubs, hospital auxiliaries or art guilds are all places for many to find friendships and connect with other women.
Women need other women in friendship and service. Ashley Young, an American musician, said it well: “A friend is not only someone you can confide in, it is someone who can mirror the trust you have shown by confiding in you as well.” An awesome way for mom to live her life.
Valerie Steimle is the mother of nine children living in Alabama and is the author of four books including "Of One Heart: Being Single in the LDS World."
