Ogden woman became widowed by suicide, now she hosts events for singles adults to meet

OGDEN — Bringing people together has become a life goal for Molly Bitton, and it stems from her own journey through grief.

"My husband passed away in March of 2013, and it was unexpected," Bitton said, adding that her husband died by suicide after years of addiction.

"Our two children were 11 and 13 at the time, and it took the life out of us," she continued. "I felt like I had this giant gaping hole in my entire life that I didn't know how to fix."

Bitton's grief journey led her to a place where she had often found comfort: her running community.

"I loved my running people, but after what happened, I just dove into the community, and a big part of that was because I could show up as me," she said. "Having your husband pass away, you have this badge on you that you carry around and people treat you differently. But my running community just loved me and treated me like I was still human and I wasn't this broken piece of a person, even though inside I did feel that way."

Bitton started running local races and even became a race pacer, helping others reach running goals. Through these experiences, she learned that she not only enjoyed what the community gave her, but also wanted to give back and provide a safe place for others to meet.

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"I've always been a community builder," she said. "I've always loved bringing people together for fun experiences. As I ran these races, it just solidified how important it was in my brain and my heart that we needed more events where adults can meet in a fun, playful environment."

Also, as a widow who now found herself in the dating world, she said she had grown weary of what that world had become.

"I cannot be the only person feeling that I want to meet people in real life," she said. "I tried dating apps, and they sucked my soul, and I felt like I lost a lot of my self-confidence and hope for meeting somebody."

Creating a safe space

She started a running group in Ogden, and then had an idea — what if she held a race that wasn't about racing, but about meeting others?

"I didn't want to show up at a bar. I didn't want to go to church to meet somebody, so I wondered, 'How can we make this happen?' and that's where the brainchild of the first singles mingle event came. I said, 'Let's put on a 5K.'"

Having a singles-mingle 5K was less about who crossed the finish line first, but more about who took the time to get to know the other runners.

"Instead of packet pick-up, it was a mingle," she said. "We had a game where they would have to find somebody who has more than eight pairs of running shoes, or find somebody who's run a Ragnar, or find a morning runner or evening runner, or someone who listens to music when they run."

As for the 5K being a race, she said that, yes, it was timed, but that it was more about meeting people along the way.

"We timed the race, but there were no prizes, and it wasn't about a competition," she said. "We weren't looking for the next winner. You're the winner if you connect with people on the run."

Holding that first event showed her that, like kids, adults just want to have fun. So she started holding other events to bring people together around shared interests. She called it Have You Met? Events, and said her goal is to provide a variety of ways for single adults to meet.

"We do volleyball; we've done (Utah) Jazz games; we just did pickleball," she said. "We have a comedy show coming up; we're doing a walk-and-talk in September. My goal for this is if you can show up for these events and just enjoy the moment, and just be open to connecting with other people, it will help you be more authentic and be more real. That's really when you're gonna meet your person."

She admits she isn't a relationship expert and says she leaves that to the many professionals who have weighed in and even spoken at her events — including Damona Hoffman from the Drew Barrymore show.

Bitton said she's seen some amazing, even long-lasting, connections come from the events.

She also said that while she is not currently in the season of looking for love herself, she enjoys creating a similarly safe place that was created for her during her time of deep grief.

"Grief doesn't always include the death of a spouse," she said. "It can be the loss of a job or of a goal or a community. We're all grieving in one way or another, and we all need our people. I want to live a good, joyful life, and I feel like I can help provide a safe space for other people."

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