Don't let your mind trap you. 4 myths to stop believing so you can make progress

SALT LAKE CITY — We know the human mind is powerful. Social scientists will tell us it's designed to protect us. To keep us safe from pain, rejection, failure, embarrassment and uncertainty. But Dr. Matt Townsend said the very same mind that protects us can also trap us.

He said to stop believing the stories that keep us comfortable, cautious and stuck and shared four myths we need to blow up in order to create some progress in our lives.

Myth 1: "Busy Movement Matters More Than Clear Direction" (The Insanity Cycle)

The Fix: The Direction-First Cycle - Before you do more, get clear on what you are trying to build.

It's common to think that constant activity means your moving forward.

"A lot of us think movement is the same as direction," Dr. Townsend said.

Instead of doing more, he said to pause and get clear about what you actually want.

"Let's figure out what we wanna be as a couple," he said. "What we wanna be as a couple might actually determine what kind of date night we need."

Before adding more action, make sure you know the destination.

Myth #2: "I've Done Everything Right, So I Deserve Good Things to Happen!" (The Entitlement Cycle)

The Fix: Trade Entitlement for Responsibility and Gratitude

This myth often shows up quietly as disappointment. You follow the rules, make responsible choices and assume life will reward you. But you face challenges anyway.

"The reality is doing everything right does not necessarily make everything perfect," Dr. Townsend emphasized.

Timing, growth, other people's choices and circumstances beyond your control are all a part of life. Instead of focusing on what you think you're owed, he said to focus on gratitude and the present moment.

"Let's just start instead trying to live in the present and start to do one thing right now that would make it great right now," Dr. Townsend said.

Happiness isn't something you are owed because of your past efforts. It's something you build through action.

Myth #3: "Your Constant Anxiety and Worry About Things Is Helping" (The Anxious Autopilot Cycle)

The Fix: Move From Worry to Wise Action

Some people think worrying feels productive. It feels responsible. It feels like caring.

"Worry doesn't help," Dr. Townsend emphasized. "It actually just stresses more."

Not only does it increase our own anxiety, but it can spread to others.

"When you take your worry and try to talk to somebody, it stresses them more," he noted.

Instead of worrying, he said to do something about it.

"The number one antidote to anxiety and worry is action," Dr. Townsend said.

When something is bothering you, ask one question: "What's the most important thing I can do right now to effectively manage my worry on that issue?"

Then go do it. Once you act, your brain changes its response.

"Your brain says, 'Okay, we've done it. Now you can relax,'" he explained.

Myth 4: "Once I'm Confident, Then I Can Act" (The Immobility Cycle)

The Fix: Exercise your character. Take principle-centered action whether you feel confident, motivated or ready

This may be one of the most common myths. We often wait until we feel confident before we take any action.

"Once I get everything lined up and it's perfect… then I'm gonna go do it," Dr. Townsend said.

It actually works the other way around. Planning, preparation and waiting only go so far. We build confidence by doing.

"You gotta deliver in order to gain confidence," he emphasized. "You gotta act and do in order to become."

Find more advice from Dr. Matt Townsend at matttownsend.com.

This story was adapted from a TV broadcast script using artificial intelligence. Every story, including those adapted with AI, is reviewed by a human editor before publication to ensure that KSL's editorial standards are upheld.