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SALT LAKE CITY — You can find just about anything at the mall like the season’s ‘must-haves’, shoes and clothes.
On Wednesday you could also find 14-year-old Shadai shopping.
“I would love to do this all the time,” she said. “This is my favorite thing.”
Wednesday wasn’t about the hunt for the perfect necklace or bag. Most teens would come to the mall with their friends. Shadai is here with her case worker. Shadai's been in foster care so long, she can't even really remember the exact amount of time.
“I don’t know,” she said. “I really don’t know.”
There are things she does keep track of, like the number of different foster homes she’s lived in.
“Yeah, 15 different homes,” she said.
She’s moved more times than most people do in a lifetime. Shadai doesn't like to talk about what led up to her landing in state custody. It's just too hard.
“I took care of my brother and my sister,” she said. “No child should have to go through that like I did. That’s what makes me sad," she said. "I feel like nobody cared for me when I was a little girl.”
Unfortunately, that's a feeling she says she still has.
“With what I’ve been through and my past, I’m pretty sure no one wants me,” she said.
She's learning other children can be especially harsh when it comes to the past.
“At my last school, I told people I was in foster care and they never talked to me again,” she said. “It made me feel really bad.”
Despite all this, she still finds a reason to smile. She still finds a reason to laugh. She still finds a reason to hope adoption will happen.
“So I’m in a home that loves me and I’m secure and I’m safe,” she said.
Until then, she is waiting and trying to stay positive that this trial is just temporary.
“It’s just like the quote says, ‘When it rains, look for rainbows. When it’s dark, look for stars,’” she said.
To learn more about Shadai or the many other children living in the Utah Foster Care system, contact The Adoption Exchange.
