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Kimberly Houk reportingAt the height of the Osmond's popularity in the 70's, Merrill Osmond came close to losing his battle with manic depression.
Today, for the first time, he spoke about that dark chapter in his life, with our Kimberly Houk.
Merrill Osmond has been on a stage performing for more than 40 years. But he's carried with him a struggle so entangling he almost gave up, and once came close to taking his own life.
Merrill Osmond/ Perfomer: "I didn't want to live, and yet here I am. I have all the wonderful blessings of a family, and I understood the gospel messages. I understood what my relationship with diety is about, and I still didn't want to live."
Diagnosed with manic depression at a young age, Merrill has spent years taking drugs to stabilize his emotions.
Merrill Osmond: "When you're a teenager and you're having number one records and everyone's out having fun, and you look at it and you see no joy. You see nothing but pain and heartache, and all you see is clouds."
Stardom at a young age carried a heavy price. A childhood full of hard work and demanding people only added to his depression.
Merrill Osmond: "You feel like you're worth nothing, and depression creates those feelings. Boy, it's a tough road."
A calmness finally came into Merrill's life when he started his own family. At that time, he started studying about depression and finally had a personal break through a couple of years ago.
Merrill Osmond: "Today, my eyes are clear. I don't have any depression. I'm taking a lot of natural medication, and I'm really kicking it."
He says learning to love himself and having a deeper understanding of his relationship with God were the tools he needed to overcome his devastating illness.
A book about Merrill's struggles with depression is now in bookstores.