Estimated read time: 4-5 minutes
This archived news story is available only for your personal, non-commercial use. Information in the story may be outdated or superseded by additional information. Reading or replaying the story in its archived form does not constitute a republication of the story.
SALT LAKE CITY -- Anxiety is on the rise the week before Hanukkah and Christmas. Therapists say most people don't even take the time to identify the problems, they just live filled with stress.
But 21 million Americans ages 15 to 44 face depression, and the holidays can make that worse. Known as "Holiday Blues," the feelings people experience during the holiday season are a result of the stress of holiday celebrations and spending, and the symptoms are similar to those of clinical depression, but are only short-term.
Symptoms include a depressed mood, decreased interest in life activities normally enjoyed, feeling overwhelmed, irritability, physical and emotional fatigue, sleep or appetite disturbances, anxiety and excessive guilt.
Avoid alcohol
Experts recommend avoiding drinking if you're suffering from the Holidays Blues. You may want to drink it to numb pain or sorrow that you feel, but it can actually make the feelings worse.
Try deep breathing and relaxation techniques instead.
Avoid sugar binges
Experts advise people who are experiencing the Holiday Blues to avoid eating too much sugar. Eating too many cookies, cakes and candy can make you lethargic or sleepy which can feel like an emotional crash at parties and family gatherings.
Stay in the moment
Symptoms* include:
- Depressed mood
- Decreased interest in life activities normally enjoyed.
- Feeling overhwhelmed
- Irritability
- Fatigue, feeling drained physically and emotionally
- Sleep or appetite disturbances
- Anxiety, feeling nervous, edgy or "keyed up"
- Excessive guilt
*Seek professional help if you experience five or more of these symptoms every day for two weeks. If you have recurring thoughts of death or suicide, get help immediately.
Avoid thinking about the past or future, especially those things that are troubling. When family offers an opportunity to talk about it, experts recommend focusing on the solutions rather than the negative parts of the experience.
"Be around music, be around the festivities that really do lighten the heart but drop your expectations, love what is and embrace the people that you're with," Hale said.
Avoid Over-Spending
Shopping and the excitement of giving someone extravagant gifts can be relieving in the short term, but when the bill comes, it can deepen depression and stress.
Avoid Resentments
Think what you can do before family gatherings, clear emotional space and prepare for those family members that challenge you.
Avoid comparisons
Even though we love family members and friends, those get-togethers during the holidays can be stressful, and for many, a time to compare themselves with their family members.
But experts are saying to avoid comparing one's life with another. A sibling's children may get better toys, their spouse might be getting them something extravagant, but Dr. Liz Hale, a clinical psychologist, advises that maybe these things are compensating for what happens in the home.
"We might feel like, ‘gosh, we're doing with less, we're being denied,'" Hale said. "Yet you never know what's going on behind closed doors. If you ever really knew, I think you would never question how good you have it.
"As a psychologist of 20 years, I can tell you things would surprise you. They look picture perfect on the outside. Be grateful for what is."
Admit feelings
Sometimes, when you are feeling down, you can't always simply pull yourself out of it. Experts say, however, that acknowledging sadness starts the healing process and holding it in can make depression worse.
"I think we need to be with people, especially people who really know us who understand ‘this is the first year without my mom,' (or) ‘this is the first year we won't have any money to spend on Christmas,' ‘things are forever different, this is the first year of my diagnosis of whatever,'" Hale said. "Let your feelings show, go ahead and cry. Tears are a beautiful thing and they are part of that healing process, so then, experience the joy."
- Avoid alcohol. Alcohol can intensify situational depression.
- Avoid sugar binges. Eating too much sugar can cause lethargy.
- Avoid dwelling on the past or future. Stay in the moment. If family members ask about challenges, talk about solutions instead of the negative.
- Avoid over-spending. The rush of shopping can backfire with depression when the bill arrives.
- Avoid resentments. Clearing emotional space will make for a more pleasant time with those begrudged family members.
- Avoid comparisons to others. Comparing your life to another can result in unnecessary bitterness.
- Confront feelings.
Acknowledge negativity, and prepare to make changes, starting the healing process.
Information: Journey Healing Centers
Hale recommends one more thing: focus on someone else. That's exactly what the Moore family did. Instead of exchanging gifts with extended family, they pulled their resources to help friends in need.
"We love the opportunity to get the kids involved," said Brett Moore, a husband and father who participated in a Secret Santa activity this year. "When they are part of it, when they know there's a 5-year-old little boy or a 7-year-old little girl that they're doing something for, it personalizes it."
The gifts were anonymous. The group did a 'ring and run.' They hit the door bell and hid until someone found the present.
"We've been the recipient, too, of people doing the same thing to us over the past couple years. So, it's kind of a way for us to pay it back," said Heather Moore.
Serving people, Hale said, can help us forget about our stresses and help heal depression.
"Really, probably, the ideal thing, which is the hardest thing to do when you're feeling really blue, is to forget about yourself. …Let's go find someone who has it worse that (we) do."
Email:cmikita@ksl.com
