Mother creates support group for children with deceased parents

Mother creates support group for children with deceased parents

(Brooke Cox)


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Editor's Note: KSL.com's mission is to build up, connect, inform and celebrate Utah's communities and families. In the Uplifting section, we feature people and charities doing good and show how you can help. SALT LAKE CITY — Brooke and Mark Cox lived in Yakima, Washington, with their children, ages 11 down to 1. On June 30, 2011, Mark died of an unexpected brain aneurysm. At 34, Brooke had become a widowed mother of five. She has since moved her family to Utah.

Brooke attended her first young widows/widowers conference nine months after Mark died. Meeting other people who understood how it felt to be a young widow or widower was very comforting to her, so she searched for something similar for her children. When she couldn't find a program designed specifically for young people who have lost a parent to death, she decided to form a nonprofit called Marked Generation.

Brooke's hope is that through this organization young people who have suffered loss will know they are "marked" for good, and they can go on to do amazing things.

How this organization is helping others:

Related:

The foundation hosts an annual Marked Youth Event. It's a full-day event for young people who have lost a parent to death. Each youth is matched up with a leader who has also lost a parent, then is organized into groups with others who are near their age. Throughout the day, they participate in team-building, leadership and unity activities. They listen to well-chosen speakers, are served snacks and meals and enjoy a concert together at the end of the day.

In addition to one large annual event, the Marked Foundation has begun to host a variety of smaller activities and events, catering to different age groups throughout the year. This will give children a chance to see each other more often and create stronger bonds with their peers.

How you can help

Someone who has lost a loved one:

Brooke's suggestions:

1. Give strengthening words of encouragement.

2. Advise them to take one step at a time and not to make any big decisions for the first year after the death, if possible, such as moving, a new job, remarriage, etc.

3. Don't claim you understand what she's going through if you don't. Saying you sympathize because your husband goes on long business trips, etc., doesn't provide comfort.

4. Those who have lost a loved one receive a lot of help and well-wishes during the first couple of months but often need support and care for months and years to come. Just because the widow or widower is wearing a smile, don't assume he or she is completely well-adjusted and happy on the inside.

Courtesy of Brooke Cox

How to help children who are grieving:

1. Let children grieve how and when they want. Don't make them talk about things they don't want to talk about. Forcing them may do more damage.

2. When a child wants to cry, let him or her. Allow him or her to do what feels natural during the process.

How you can help with the cause:

1. Volunteer

More volunteers are needed to run the annual event and smaller activities throughout the year. There have been several requests to expand into other states. Volunteers are needed in other states to grow throughout the country.

2. Donate*

Monetary donations make additional youth events possible. You can also sponsor a family who would like to attend an event.

Product donations are always useful, such as banners, posters, T-shirts, food and snacks for youth meals, paper products, etc.

Donating usage time in a space such as a skating rink, bowling alley, warehouse, meeting space, gymnasium, etc., would be helpful. Cutting facility costs will increase the foundation's ability to host more events.

Marked Generation is making the world a better place. The foundation's youth participants will find comfort and support through friends and leaders they interact with who share in their sense of loss. This will build them up for years to come.

*KSL.com does not assure that the monies deposited to the account will be applied for the benefit of the persons named as beneficiaries. If you are considering a deposit to the account, you should consult your own advisors and otherwise proceed at your own risk.


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About the Author: Amber Linebaugh ---------------------------------

Amber is a KSL.com contributor and co-founder of the travel blog globecandy.com. She currently resides in Cedar Hills, Utah with her husband and three boys. Email: amber@sldestinations.com.

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